From the age of five, three of my uncles sexually abused me. Whenever my parents had a party there would be a lot of drinking and one of my uncles would creep into the bedroom I shared with my sisters and molest one of us. I knew it was wrong, I didn’t like it, but I really didn’t understand because I was so young when it started and I didn’t dare speak up because they were our uncles and I was scared.
Part of the healing process involved me speaking to my mother about it; I asked her why she hadn’t seen what had been happening to her children. She broke down, crying, and told me that she had been abused as a child, and my grandmother too. She didn’t know any different, she had thought that’s just what happened.
Through the support of my sisters and my counsellor I have put an end to the abuse that has been in our family for generations. I was very vigilant with my own children: strict about with whom they could associate but also open and honest in my communication with them.
I also love God. I believe there must be something greater out there for me; maybe I’ve been through all of this to help people. I’ve come across a lot of people who have just needed advice and I can help because I’ve gone though it.
Helen, New Zealand